Wow, itapos;s been a long time since I wrote on here, I completely forgot I even had this account. A few things have changed since my last entries, itapos;s been almost a year since those entries crazy enough. I fought the depression back, and won, and with moving to my old town I did exactly what I set out to do. I was only there for a short time, couple months, but it gave me time to regain my composure. I moved on, and back into the city of salt.
Scary move at first. I kept imagining things going back to exactly the way they were before and thats not something I really want to be a part of again. Iapos;m still unsure, nine months into it, If it was really the best move, but in a lot of ways itapos;s been great. I got a job with pepsi for a while and just recently moved on to a new job working for Red Bull. Iapos;m making more money now then I think I ever have, scratch that, then I KNOW�I ever have. Itapos;s a good feeling to not be broke at the end of every month and to be able to go out and do things, or just buy something that I like. I just need to learn to manage the money a little better so I can save up rather than throw it all down the drain or pour it into my PS3.� Things are decent at best up here and iapos;m happy with that. Content, but not ready to give up.
In some ways though, I did just step into the same vicious, lonely circle that I left Salt Lake with. Iapos;ve ditched many of my old friends due to lack of interests, or just lack of interest and really havenapos;t made the time, or the effort to make new ones. It seems like half the people I meet are "too good" or too stupid and itapos;s easier to just go about my business on my own. My brother being here really helps out though. Heapos;s my best friend and itapos;s nice to have him around, when he can be around. Due to him being around though iapos;ve hit the bottle pretty hard inthe last couple months, spending the majority of every weekend drunk in a bar or stumbling downtown in need of coffee, a good woman, and something iapos;m not sure of yet. Itapos;s a fun time though, and I think thats whats most important.
As far as dating goes...forget it. Itapos;s been one bad experience after another it seems, ever since Megan left Iapos;ve tried a few different routes, they either end up dead ends, or they donapos;t and I wish they had. Most of that is my own failure to really speak up or ask anyone, but it seems like all of the women who catch my attention at taken in some way. The ones I did ask when I was actively looking. I met some nice girls, but nothing worth purseuing. Or at least none that thought I was worth it. So I took to Internet dating for a little while, mostly through Craigs List and a few loose ends on Myspace. Most turned out to be horrible. A couple alright. I think the first good one I scared away by rambling on about something rediculous and mentioning children. She thought I was saying I wanted her to have my children and thats not something I would ever to say to someone I just met, but what can ya do? Learn to hold my tongue. The next was good, for a few weeks. I thought that was going to go somewhere but we started really butting heads. The typical things really, Iapos;m not affectionate enough, I this, I that. Really we just were not compatible. Happens. Really havnapos;t met anyone worth dating though, thats single and willing that is. Oh well. Sheapos;ll show up when the time is right I guess. I just canapos;t believe itapos;s already been a year since my last girlfriend.
Overall though things are much improved and I think they will continue to get better.� Im in a financial and emotional slump at the moment but nothing I canapos;t handle. Just keep swimming right?
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